In an emotional confession that has resonated deeply with fans, Loose Women star Coleen Nolan has opened up about the gut-wrenching decision she and her siblings had to make in putting their beloved mother, Maureen, into a care home. Speaking candidly about the guilt, heartache, and cruel trolling she faced following the choice, Coleen revealed the emotional toll it’s taken on her family.
Maureen, who passed away in 2007 at the age of 81 after a five-year battle with dementia, was a loving mother who raised eight children. However, as her dementia worsened, it became impossible for Coleen and her siblings to continue caring for her at home. In a tearful interview, Coleen shared the emotional burden of that decision and the ongoing grief she carries.
The Hardest Decision: A Family in Crisis
On Loose Women, Coleen explained how the decision to place Maureen in a care home was not made lightly. She described it as “probably the hardest decision” she and her siblings ever faced. “We looked after her as long as we could,” Coleen shared, describing the difficult situation they found themselves in as Maureen’s dementia escalated. She continued: “She wanted to stay in sheltered accommodation, but then that became too dangerous. You know, she was leaving electric kettles on a gas hob and not even noticing… my brother would go around and there was smoke.”
The deterioration in Maureen’s condition was heartbreaking, and Coleen recalled how her mother’s actions began to put herself and others at risk. “She’d get up at three in the morning, and we’d have to put double-locked doors because she’d think it was daytime and just wander,” Coleen recalled, explaining the chaotic and frightening moments that ultimately led them to seek professional care. As a family, they had already been doing their best—caring for Maureen between them—but it soon became apparent that more specialized care was necessary for her safety.
A Moment of Panic: The Danger of Dementia
One particularly poignant moment Coleen shared on the show involved her mother mistakenly giving her daughter, Ciara, “sweets” that were actually her own medication. Coleen reflected on how lucky they were that Ciara, unlike her other children, never put things in her mouth. “If that had been the boys, they’d have eaten them,” she said. The story underscored just how dangerous Maureen’s condition had become, as dementia can severely impair one’s judgment and awareness, often leading to life-threatening situations.
As the responsibilities of caring for Maureen grew heavier, the strain on Coleen and her siblings was undeniable. “It was just getting more and more. She needed more and more care, and we were working, and we had young kids,” Coleen confessed. Despite their best efforts, it became clear that they could no longer provide the level of care Maureen required, and the decision to place her in a care home was the only way to ensure her safety and well-being.
Giving Maureen a Choice: A Final Act of Love
In a touching moment of respect for their mother, Coleen and her siblings allowed Maureen to choose the care home where she would live. “We let her pick the home she was moving into,” Coleen explained. Despite the family’s preference for a modern, newly-built facility, Maureen rejected it, instead selecting a care home that Coleen admitted wasn’t their first choice. But ultimately, it was Maureen’s choice, and Coleen made sure to honor it, even though she knew her mother might not fully understand the gravity of the situation. “She didn’t quite understand what was happening, to be fair,” Coleen added.
The Pain of Cruel Trolling: ‘How Can You Sleep at Night?’
While Coleen and her family tried their best to care for Maureen, the decision to place her in a care home was met with an overwhelming amount of criticism. Coleen bravely revealed the cruel trolling she faced after making the choice. “I cannot tell you the amount of people that trolled us over it,” she admitted. Many online commentators accused the family of abandoning Maureen, with some even questioning how they could live with themselves after sending their mother to a care home.
“People would say, ‘How dare you? Your mum raised eight of you, and not one of you can look after her?’” Coleen said, visibly hurt by the comments. The accusations cut deep, but Coleen made it clear that the decision wasn’t made out of neglect—it was made out of necessity. Maureen’s condition had become too advanced, and she needed professional care that her family simply could not provide.
The trolling took an emotional toll on Coleen and her siblings, leaving them feeling guilty and misunderstood. “I don’t sleep at night. None of us do,” Coleen admitted. “We cry every night because we’ve had to make this decision.”
The Ongoing Guilt: A Family in Pain
Despite the love and care they had for their mother, the guilt of placing her in a care home still lingers. “Yeah, we could. We could all look after my mum, but it wouldn’t be safe,” Coleen said. “She got the really aggressive form [of dementia]. She had no idea where she was. She needed 24-hour supervision.” The family’s decision, while painful, was made with Maureen’s safety in mind, but the emotional burden of that choice remains a heavy weight.
“There’s still this guilt,” Coleen confessed, revealing that even after all these years, the harsh words from critics still affect her. “How can you sleep at night?” was a question that haunted her and her siblings, and it became a symbol of the unrelenting pain they carried. Despite the overwhelming support from many, the cruel comments continued to haunt them.
Finding Strength in Family and Support
Throughout her heartbreaking journey, Coleen has leaned on her family and the love they share to help navigate the difficulties of caregiving. While the guilt and trolling remain constant, the Nolans’ strong bond has helped them through their toughest moments. Coleen’s vulnerability in sharing this painful part of her life has allowed others to see the true emotional cost of making decisions regarding a loved one’s care.
The outpouring of support from fans and the public has shown Coleen that, despite the cruel trolling, her family’s decision was made with the utmost love and care. For those who have experienced similar situations, Coleen’s story is a reminder that caregiving is a journey full of hard choices, heartache, and, sometimes, harsh judgment from those who don’t understand.
In the end, Coleen’s message is one of compassion and empathy. “We did the best we could,” she said. And for many families, that’s all anyone can do when faced with the impossible decision of caring for a loved one with a progressive illness like dementia. Through her openness, Coleen has helped others feel less alone in their own struggles with care, guilt, and grief.
A Final Message of Love and Understanding
The decision to place a loved one in a care home is never easy, and Coleen Nolan’s candid admission of the pain she still feels serves as a powerful reminder of the emotional toll caregiving can take. The guilt and trolling that followed their decision may never completely fade, but the love and care that Coleen and her siblings showed their mother will always remain. For Coleen, it’s not about the judgments of others—it’s about knowing they did their best for Maureen, even when it was the hardest thing they ever had to do.
